Well, I thought I had at least two days to write some posts ahead of time before the Thanksgiving holiday, but some family business has intervened. So this will be my only post for the next week. See you when I get back.
Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
My local chapter of the RWA has a tradition for our Christmas party. We each bring our favorite book from the past year and then swap them. What makes it extra fun is that everyone gets the option of stealing someone else’s pick when their turn comes up, which is always fun in a good-natured bunch. (Emphasis on the good-natured. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen a good slap fest over a purloined gift basket of perfume.) About this time, I start thinking about everything I’ve read this last year. Which one was my favorite? Of course, first I have to remember if I’ve read it this year or last. Not that it really matters, mind you. I’m fairly certain neither my chapter’s president, Emma Clair, nor the vice-president, Michelle McGinnis, will hook me up to a lie detector to make sure I didn’t read the book at any point after January 1, 2008.
Jane Sevier might. Just for an excuse to put someone under a hot, bright light and grill them. It’d be good experience for a suspense/thriller writer. 
I could see Lexi Connor (who is cruelly dangling unannounced news before us) doing it, too. All you suspense folks make me suspicious. Either that or I have a suspicious nature.
But I digress. How about I try and narrow down my options to the big three, and hopefully I’ll have settled on one by the time the Christmas party rolls around. The contenders are:
NIGHTLIFE by Rob Thurman 
While this book has two strikes against it in terms of ARWA Christmas Party Eligibility–it’s not technically a romance, but a dark urban fantasy with romantic elements, and I did not technically read it this year–I feel it’s still a strong contender. For the first obstacle, consider this: I absorbed the book in one sitting; inhaled it might be a better term, and there’s not really a rule that says the book I bring has to be a romance. It’s just a better bet for a group of romance writers.
My reasoning for the second argument, that I didn’t read this book within the year, is that I have read the sequel this year, which makes that one eligible. However, as this series is fairly dependent on continuity, and jumping into the second book without reading the first will lead to a lot of confusion, it’d only be fair to start from the beginning, right?
Yeah, I thought so, too.
CONVERSATIONS WITH THE FAT GIRL or SEEING ME NAKED by Liza Palmer 
The second option is a Liza Palmer book, I’ve enjoyed both of these. Conversations with the Fat Girl is probably my favorite of the two, but I received it at the 2007 RWA National Conference, and I’m trying to avoid giving conference books at the Christmas Party as half the people there likely have them, too. Then again, I really loved the book, and who’s to say it won’t at least be passed along to someone who hasn’t read it? And I know for sure that I didn’t read this one until 2008, despite having gotten it in 2007, because it’s on the TBR list over on the left. *Grins* Who’d a thunk that list would’ve been good for something besides an example of passion meeting a severe lack of time?
CAUSING HAVOC by Lori Foster 
Last but not least, Causing Havoc, another TBR List victim. This one’s light and fun and good as a post-Christmas stress relief read. Your in-laws drive you crazy? Does having your kids home for holiday break while hopped up on sugar send you to the brink? Traveling for the annual family fight/forgive/fight/forgive/fight/forgive ritual? This is a good book to help relax and have a laugh or two.
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Just some odds and ends here because the Day Job has sucked my brain dry. I kick Day Job in the shins and then run away. Figuratively, of course. So today’s post isn’t all that exciting in regards to any contribution toward the World of Writing. In all honesty, neither is it that exciting in the World of NiRei. It’s just a little bit of nothing for a stressed-out Thursday:
1. Someone found their way onto my site today by googling: “terry bradshaw, ‘donkey named’”. Thanks for stopping by but, um…WTF?
2. The movie mentioned in The Post That Will Not Die did not have any hits, at all, on Tuesday, 11/18, as mentioned by my post yesterday. It has, however, had multiple hits both yesterday and today. Looks like the damn thing’s back.
3. Sweet Chloe, my poor little car, has fought the good fight, but I’ve decided it’s come time to put her to pasture. (Huzzah for added stress.) After ten years without a car payment, it looks as though I will return to the world of suck-all-your-disposable-income car ownership. As dorky and sentimental as I can be about the weirdest things, I’m likely to cry and hug my car goodbye when it’s time to leave her behind.
4. Because of #3, as well as the aforementioned stress at the Day Job, NaNoWriMo has officially bit the dust. This week, starting Monday, I logged in only 1,000 words. I managed to skip into 20M, but 30M in 10 days including 2 days of travel and 2 days of family is pretty much impossible. While this does not mean that I’m going to allow myself to lose momentum on a story I’ve gotten pretty gung-ho about, it does mean the 50M’s out.
5. There actually isn’t a five, but I thought it’d be good to end on it. 
And so, a limerick:
NiRei signed up for NaNo
For which she had a great plan-o.
But then Day Job interfered,
And reality appeared,
And now she’s becoming a wino.
Hmm… Maybe I should stick to novels…
I lapsed quite a long time on this blog. Disappeared into the internet ether only to reemerge from the primordial, binary ooze to discover that I have a post that will not die.
Ever since it’s incarnation, it has gotten at least one hit every single day. Often 2-5, which isn’t a whole lot unless you consider that those 2-5 are the ONLY hits I may have gotten that day. While the numbers haven’t been huge, the attention it’s received from Googlers has been so consistent that this one post has now received almost three times as many hits as my “About the Author” page. (Which, by the way, I’m thinking of changing again.)
I’ve been watching this curiosity, wondering about the general underlying phenomenon apparently attached to the movie in question. I decided to wait until the day arrived that the post in question didn’t receive a single hit before I said anything about it, more out of a mild, general interest than anything else. What can I say? Weird things attract my attention. I’m easily entertained by the mundane yet bizarre, intrigued by the blips of whimsy in an otherwise autonomous world that–ooh, shiny!
Word Count: 19,512
As of Sunday, November 16, I have officially logged in 19,512 words. Ha! Needless to say, I’m quite proud of myself despite the fact that I should have been at 25M on Friday. Still, just over 10M words in a week is fairly good considering the majority of them were crammed into one weekend long writeathon.
Well, most of the weekend anyway. The Saturday writeathon was interrupted by a Dr. Doolittle-athon, and I am ashamed. I let myself get sidetracked by television. Worse, by a couple of movies I’ve already seen. Yes, I think they’re cute, but still. I had work to do, and I let myself procrastinate. What can I say? I’m weak.
Sigh.
At this stage of NaNoWriMo, I have to write 2,177.71 words per day (approximately) to reach the goal of 50M at the end of the month. Now, assuming 8 hours of sleep at night and 10 hours of the Day Job including drive time, that leaves me with 6 hours of “free” time. That’s 360 minutes, which equates to approximately 6.05 words per minute. Thank God I type faster than that because I would kind of like to eat at some point during that time period. I’m funny that way.
Hmm… I think I may actually time myself at some point to see how many words I type per minute. Of course, that’s determined by how well the words are flowing and/or the scene moving. And I really should have begun timing myself months ago so I’d have a more credible average by now. Then again, I could adapt the wpm I tested at for my former temp agency.
Okay, I’m getting sidetracked here. My apologies. Can you tell I like math? In any event, these numbers are assuming that I’ll be able to write everyday, but I’m going to be travelling this Thanksgiving, and I already know that my family is not all that keen on the idea of my writing when I’m there. In fact, two family members (who shall remain nameless) have already hedged the issue, subtly letting me know that it will, in fact, not be okay for me to clatter away at the laptop while the turkey’s on the table. Not that I would, mind you, but I am planning to bring the computer in the hopes of sneaking an hour or two in the mornings or at night because without that little bit I’ll lose four days of writing time.
How does that equate in words? I’m glad you asked! Without those four days, I’m up to having to write 3,048.8 words per day. If you consider that I’ll likely lose the day before travelling because of general packing, cleaning, and taking care of my pets, then we’re up to 3,387.56 words per day. That’s a lot. Likely doable, but potentially too much with a full-time job and any form of social life. At least for me. Maybe one day I’ll find a way to write about 3,500 words a day while still being able to do everything else I want to do, but at the moment it’s unlikely.
Hang on… I’m entertaining a wonderful daydream with me as a full-time writer in an office with sage-colored walls and wide windows…
Okay. Now for the inspiration:
Matt Damon
1. Look up “synopsis” in the dictionary. Then realize that the word “brief” can have a wider definition than you initially thought, nor had you ever thought it’d be linked with your story. However, being quite clever, research further on various literary agencies’ and publishing companies’ websites for a better idea of what’s expected.
2. Wonder about the sanity of said literary agents and editors. Do they honestly expect you to condense 90,000 words into something less than five pages? Heck, even the “long” synopsis at 20 pages is an insult to the year’s worth of hard work, dedication, and love you’ve poured into your manuscript. Surely the synopsis requirement is a conspiracy of typos.
3. Resign yourself to the fact that, yes, the detailed, subtly intricate story you’ve written needs to be somehow restricted to just a few short pages. Then sulk.
4. Okay, time to buck up and grit your teeth, gird your loins, and tighten your bootstraps. You’re going in. You are, after all, a professional. You can do this.
5. Stop at thirty-six pages and start to panic. You’ve only gotten through a quarter of your book and you’re already over the length of a long synopsis, and hardly anyone accepts long synopses. Blindly search for a paper bag and breathe into it until the dizziness goes away.
6. Decide to conduct more research. Someone somewhere must have written something on how to write these stupid, idiotic, damnable things.
7. Discover three bits of wisdom: first, focus on the relationship on your main characters and remove as many secondary characters and side plots as possible; second, hit the big three plots points and/or emotional turning points that show both character arc and storyline; third, Nora Roberts doesn’t write synopses, so there may be hope for you yet.
8. Scrap the thirty-six pages entirely and try again.
9. Stop after twenty pages. And while taking some pride in the fact that you made it at least three-quarters of the way through the story this time, you’re still including too much detail. Debate whether to keep going or start all over. Again. While making this crucial decision, medicate yourself with food and mindless entertainment in the form of rocky road ice cream and Frasier reruns.
10. Decide to slog through until the end and manage to finish in under thirty pages.
11. Retrieve the red pen from where it landed after being thrown against the wall once NiRei’s 12 Easy Steps to Editing had been completed. Tackle the synopsis and ruthlessly hack off words, sentences, and even entire paragraphs.
12. Clean up the massacred mess of a synopsis and read it through. Then repeat step 11. Clean up and read through again. Yep, you guess it. Repeat step 11. One more time: clean up, read through, repeat step 11. Then finally, finally clean up, read through, and realize that you’ve hit your goal and have completed a decent synopsis under five pages long. Huzzah! Celebrate by collapsing into bed and falling immediately asleep so you won’t have to think about the next step: The Query.
“Captain?”
“Hrmphmr…”
Hope nudged the shaggy lab’s broad head with her nose. “Captain?”
He snorted, his legs jerking, and then he blinked one eye open and gazed blearily at the mini dachshund. “Huh? What?”
“Do you think she’s awake?” Hope stared at him, her body bound tight with anxiety, her red-brown eyes pleading and hopeful.
Captain opened both eyes, blinking the sleep from them. “What?”
“Anna. Do you think she’s awake?” She stood up, glanced at the door, and then sat back down. “She should be up by now, don’t you think?”
“I don’t know.” He stopped to listen, straining for hear any sounds in the house. Hope cocked her head, too, her small body quivering. The soft gray of early morning filtered through the windowshades, and Captain didn’t think Anna would be up for another couple of hours yet. “It doesn’t sound like it. Why?”
Word Count: See Day 6
NaNoWriMo has temporarily stalled. “Why?” you ask. Well, dear friend, wipe those tears from your eyes and raise your chin because all is not lost. NaNoWriMo has stalled because my car has stalled–er, ceased to move at any rate. My trusty, faithful Chloe (aka my car) still has her Go Get ‘Em attitude, but currently has the equivalent of a fractured leg. She can’t even limp along.
Why does this affect my writing schedule? Because now, on top of the Day Job, I have been negotiating with insurance companies, tow truck drivers, and my archnemsis: The Mechanic.
Dum-da-duuum [Dramatic music for emphasis]
This adventure (ahem) has taught me three things:
1. When bestowed the gracious honor of being your local chapter’s Librarian, remember that keeping the library itself in the trunk of your car is only efficient when you actually have your car.
2. Despite how many times I’ve said this is in the past, it apparently bears repeating. I need to take a basic automotive course or buy a book. Just something so when someone says “lower ball joint”, my first thought isn’t related to anatomy.
3. I have some truly wonderful people in my life.
A Non-Writer’s or Beginning Writer’s Dictionary has been updated.
Thanks to Gary for the revision date suggestion!
Yes, I know it’s technically the 10th, but I write these things in advance. So sue me.
As of yesterday, 11/5, I have written 9,002 words. Yea me! I’ve never been one to monitor word counts or pages written or anything of the like. I’ve tried maintaining spreadsheets to see if I have an average word count per day, but I’m not any good at updating it, which I find rather funny since so much of the Day Job requires me to keep tracking sheets and schedules and who-got-what-when lists. Then again, maybe that’s why any lists outside of work get neglected. One can only live so much by The List.
Give me a neat little bar graph/counter thing on a website, though, and I’m apparently a word counting fiend! I especially like NaNoWriMo’s goal of 50M words. As I write single-title (and can be horribly long-winded before the Righteous Pen of Ruthless Cutting is bestowed unto said manuscript), I lean more toward the 80M-90M manuscripts. While 50M words in a month is daunting whether or not the book is ultimately finished at that length, for some reason it’s easier for me to handle than the concept of one book in one month.
Maybe I’ll save that for December. 
And now my favorite part, presenting the hormone-spiking inspiration for this NaNoWriMo update, David Carr, former quarterback for the Houston Texans and now back-up quarterback for the New York Giants. (Hormone-spiking, get it? Spiking?… It’s a football term. Uh, yeah. I’m stopping now.)
